Being the boss is tricky sometimes. You want to create an environment of trust and respect while encouraging efficiency and managing a positive work environment. You can’t please everyone and when working with different personalities and stressors of your own, you might not even realize you’ve participated in some unsavory management tactics to get through the day.

To save yourself, and your employees, ask yourself the following questions to ensure you’re not taking advantage of your power.

Are you using intimidation to reach success?

Bullies are easy to spot because they don’t bully everyone, only those they feel enough power over to victimize. So you should ask yourself if certain members of your team make you feel more powerful than others and then begin to examine why.

Boss bullying can occur by way of sarcasm, yelling and sometimes even physical violence such as slamming drawers, throwing things and mishandling staff. If you use intimidation or humiliation tactics to get results from your team, consider that they’re simply complying with demands to avoid the brunt of your rage. Bullying behavior warrants lower performance and increased absenteeism, to name just a few negative reactions.

Do you manipulate?

If in an effort to meet business objectives, you find yourself choosing your immediate needs over the business’ long-term needs by way of lies and mind games, you might be a manipulator.

Making false promises to promote an employee so as to get better performance from them, pinning staff against each other, taking sides and picking favorites are a few signs to look for.

Are you a colleague-boss?

Do you try to be the “cool boss” by denying your power and trying to make everyone else feel equal? While there can be benefits to this tactic, without proper finesse and the right perspective you could be causing more harm than good. By failing to acknowledge the power you have regarding promotions, salaries, hiring and firing and access to information, you’re building a false reality within the department. You might even read as insecure and uncomfortable with your own authority which does more harm than just allow you to be taken advantage of; you’re also untrustworthy which can make your staff uncomfortable, too. And when the time comes for you to use your power to make a decision, your staff will be faced with the sudden reality that they’re not your equal after all.

Do you intrude on your employees’ privacy?

No one feels comfortable working for a snoopy boss. If you don’t trust your employees, a problem exists too large to fix by standing over their computer screen or checking their printing queue. Instead of quietly creeping up on working employees or keeping your ear tight on coffee break chatter, learn how to build a bigger trust among the team.

Do you encourage failure?

Do you set unrealistic goals for your employees or change project guidelines often, causing extra work and stress on the team? Do you avoid providing honest and constructive feedback? Do you withhold information that could be vital in the success of a project? You might be setting your staff up to fail and taking a deeper look is in everyone’s best interest.

You probably don’t mean to abuse your authority but if you find yourself questioning any of the above, you might want to reevaluate your management technique. It’s important for you to keep your perspective through the daily stress of being the boss otherwise you’ll lose the team’s respect and much more loss will follow suit.

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Do you want to motivate and lead your staff more effectively? My executive coaching services can help you hone your leadership skills and clearly define your goals and objectives. Also offering Corporate Coaching for Organizations.

Not all types of bosses are horrible, but even if you’re trying your best, you might be using methods that don’t translate to your employees with the same intention you think they do. Let us help you figure out what type(s) of boss you might be and how you can make some minor adjustments to improve your relationship with the team.

The Buddy

Are you trying hard to be friends with your team? Making jokes, being lenient about the rules, planning fun events to bond over? While levity has its place in the office, make sure you’re not using your coolness to detract from actually taking care of your team where it matters. Free pizza might be a nice bonus on a Friday afternoon but if those tactics distract you from being knowledgeable and reliable during the rest of the day, you might need to reprioritize. Your employees are seeing through it, whether you want to believe it or not.

The Phantom

Are you always on some kind of business trip or locked away behind the closed door of your office? Being a trusted manager means you need to put in some face time with your team. Don’t leave the team searching for guidance and coming up short because they can’t find you or know how to approach you. Being present and engaging is important.

The Manipulator

Do you find yourself making promises you can’t keep just to appease a situation? You’re likely causing more harm than good. Lip service from a manager is one of the most frustrating things for an employee to endure and when they don’t get the promotion you promised, your tactics will backfire quickly. Be an honest advocate for your team; they’ll understand your limitations, you don’t have to play mind games.

The Softy

If you think you’re making it easier on your employees to use kid-gloves when managing, you’re not. Eventually the overall needs of the business will catch up to you and your team alike, and by then everyone will feel too overwhelmed to be productive. Being the boss means making difficult decisions. If you’re too nice to make those decisions, you’ll end up molding a lazy team that will grow to disrespect you in no time. Give your team the chance to be proactive rather than reactive.

The Monster

Don’t be a softy, but don’t be harsh on your team, either. People skills are crucial to your success as a manager and if you’re missing general human decency, perhaps you should consider a role where you interact less with coworkers. Shaming your staff or being unnecessarily difficult when it comes to work challenges or personal issues will provide you with a fearful, resentful, unproductive group of employees. Not everyone is cut out to be a manager, if this is particularly difficult for you, it might be time for a change.

Your intentions are probably pure but your methods might not reflect that. Don’t let your own workplace pressures get in the way of how you manage your team. Leadership involves understanding, guidance and the proper perspective; the results you’ll get from the right balance of that will be worth it.

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Do you want to motivate and lead your staff more effectively? My executive coaching services can help you hone your leadership skills and clearly define your goals and objectives.

You’ve got a full plate – I won’t try to argue with you on that. But being busy implementing new ideas and meeting your boss’s expectations is no excuse to ignore the people-managing portion of your job.

Your employees are always trying to tell you something whether you want to hear it or not. So how do you know if you’re the kind of boss they feel comfortable bringing honest feedback to, or if you’re the kind of boss they won’t waste their time on?

1. Pardon the Interruption

Are you interrupting? Assuming? Judging? Distracted?

These are not four qualities of a good listener but they might be qualities of an overworked boss. The key to listening is being quiet; that includes you, your inner monologue and the external distractions. Put the phone away, stop checking your email, just offer your full attention to the matter at hand. Listen with both ears.

2. Can You Elaborate?

Are you asking more questions and engaging?

Never assume you have information you don’t. If you’re engaged with a concerned employee, ask as many questions as you can until you fully understand the situation. Listen with new ears and you’ll be surprised not just by what new things you learn but by how appreciated your employee will feel.

3. One More Thing

Are you following up?

Just because the conversation is over, doesn’t mean your involvement is. Failing to remember the discussion can jeopardize your trustworthiness and forgetting to follow up can do even more damage. If the chat concluded with an action item you were supposed to move on, be sure you do it. You’ll hear from your employees less and less if they feel ignored.

4. If You’re Happy and You Know it

Do you know what your employees want and need to keep them engaged and happy?

Are you familiar with the people on your team enough to know what matters most to them? Perhaps you think a great work incentive is to offer midday snacks to break the 2pm slump but what if Joanie, a tired mother of 3, is on a diet? Perhaps a better treat would be to let your employees off work 15 minutes early. Then Joanie can grab a healthy snack and spend some extra time with the kids before bedtime. An incentive idea might sound great to you but as with most things in life, know your audience. And don’t be surprised if the snack cart doesn’t motivate the way you expected.

5. Listen with your Eyes

Sometimes your employees will feel too scared or uncomfortable to bring something to your attention directly. Don’t blame them for it. Instead, open your eyes and see if you notice anything about morale, productivity or office politics that might need addressing. Surely you’ve had experiences in the past where you wanted to share something with your boss but didn’t feel comfortable doing so. Did you show any distress signs? Your team is likely going to draw on the same ones when things go wrong.

People want to matter; they want to be heard. One of the most frustrating experiences you could provide an employee is to ignore, patronize or judge their concerns.

Your employees are the expert of their jobs. They’re on the frontlines doing the hands on work. So be sure you’re listening to what they’re trying to communicate to you. It’s imperative that you believe it and it’s imperative that you help them believe it.

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Do you want to motivate and lead your staff more effectively? My executive coaching services can help you hone your leadership skills and clearly define your goals and objectives.

Are you playing favorites with your employees? Initially you may think that’s a crazy question, but what if your actions told your team a different story?

Managing a variety of personality types may present a unique challenge and one that if ignored, could result in some member of the team feeling less favored and overlooked.

Your job is to treat your employees with fairness in relation to the inherent inequalities that come with the job. In other words, not every employee will be equally motivated or successful; some are bound to be stars, making big sales, working after hours, growing exponentially. That employee should be the first to get approved for a day off; that’s not favoritism, it’s fairness.

But fairness isn’t always as easy as it seems. Here are some ways to notice if you’re treating your employees differently based on all the wrong things.

• You remind me of me – are you prone to being more inclusive to employee who mostly resembles you? Are you both the same gender, nationality, sexuality or religion? Do you both have kids the same age? Do you look similarly? Come from the same city? Have the same career goals? While these qualities could make it more pleasant to work with the person, giving them special treatment or using them as your go-to based solely on the comfortable feeling they give you would be showing preferential treatment.
• We have the same outside hobbies – so you both root for the Giants or like listening to classic rock? Maybe you both like golfing a few holes on the weekend. Does this make you more prone to share your work time with this employee? Are you putting them in charge of the new project because you feel you know them a little better? This is preferential treatment.
• MY boss loves you – ignoring all other factors in effort to play in to your boss’ opinion is a bad idea. If the employee isn’t meeting the requirements of the job and your manager doesn’t see it, playing into their admiration can cause problems in productivity and office morale. Definitely avoid this preferential treatment.
• Sharing the same vices – don’t let the bond you forge over smoke breaks and coffee breaks give them the one-up on new projects. Once your back in the office, make sure everyone’s on a level playing field.

So you realized you do, in fact, favorite some employees for the wrong reasons. What should you ask yourself to correct the effects?

Are your decisions clear? When you make a tough decision, you might need to explain how you arrived at it to avoid misinterpretations. Implement a standard for assignment delegation: if Bill has accounting experience, he can do the budget. If Mary handles marketing, she gets to go to the marketing seminar.  If Joe has more seniority, he gets the first pick of vacation days.

Are you evenly divvying up your time? A manager’s time is a precious thing, if you find yourself with one go-to employee, you’re probably sending a powerful message. Dividing your time equally, whether weekly, monthly or quarterly will display your commitment to building team relationships. Focused one-on-one check-ins are a great way to begin doing this.

Is everyone aware of their performance and expectations? Are you offering transparent feedback about the performance of your team or are you leaving them guessing? If it’s the latter, you should reconsider. Being up front with how an employee is doing will eliminate the unnecessary ambiguity that might be fueling the fire.

It’s not uncommon for you to have people you prefer to work with, but a leader cannot create an environment where employees feel unimportant, unchallenged and underappreciated. Be careful to sidestep those instinctual favoriting behaviors and re-engage with your team as a whole.

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Do you want to motivate and lead your staff more effectively? My executive coaching services can help you hone your leadership skills and clearly define your goals and objectives.

So you’ve held a lot of meetings in your career and haven’t gotten any complaints yet? It’s still a worthy idea to explore our check list and make sure you’re doing everything you can to hold valuable, engaging meetings that don’t waste too much time.

1. Make It Matter

This may seem like an obvious one but we’ve all sat through those meetings where we wondered why we were there in the first place. Asking employees and colleagues away from their desk for any extended amount of time should be done with purpose, so make sure you have an agenda, a goal and only invite the necessary team members. If your meeting topic can be handled easily in an email, opt for that instead.

2. What Was That Part About an Agenda?

Before the meeting even begins, when it’s just an idea and a blip on your calendar, you should be compiling information and ideas. Outline your topics and define your goals and then distribute that to the team prior to the meeting so they can prepare anything they might want to add or ask. If everyone goes into the meeting on the same page, imagine how much more could be gained and time could be saved.

3. Ask For Input

Meetings shouldn’t consistently be lectures where you stand up and blurt out information and everyone else listens. Everyone gets more out of the conference if you allow for collaboration and sharing. If you’re presenting an idea about a certain task or department, ask those who already do that task or work in that department what their input is.

4. … But Keep in Charge

It’s great if you hold the types of meetings where people can just speak up when they have something to add, but sometimes this can prove problematic. If an argument erupts or someone starts to take over the meeting to prove their own point, you’ll want to step in and take back the reigns. Efficient conversation is good, a hostile takeover is not.

5. End it with Action

Before everyone leaves the room, ensure you’ve been clear about the next steps. What are the actionable items that need to be executed to accomplish the goals you discussed during the meeting? Who will be in charge of which action items? What’s the time frame for completion? Who will they report to in the process? Be clear about these expectations and be sure to follow up, otherwise your meeting was just hot air.

So in just 5 easy steps, you can take your meetings from inefficient and one-sided to productive, team-building sessions.

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Do you want to motivate and lead your staff more effectively? My executive coaching services can help you hone your leadership skills and clearly define your goals and objectives.